Teachers Who Lost Touch with The Child

I attended a workshop on life education last week. The speaker proudly showed off hundreds of pages of texts, essays, worksheets, assessment tools, and suitcases of DVDs, games, computer programs, and just about every instructional media available out there. The speaker announced to the audience that he had spent over 10 years of research and another 20 years of hard work into developing these teaching aids. He was confidence that if a child or teenager ever encountered a tragic life event, such as the death a relative, then he can rebuild his/her life by studying through these nicely designed materials. And parents or teachers or just about anybody could easily educate somebody else about the meaning of life through these magical teaching aids.

Maybe I am being too cynical. But I truly believe that he had wasted 30 years of his life. I just can't imagine a child losing his mother would be interested in going through all the boring worksheets and repetitive propaganda telling you not to kill yourself. A child would probably have more insights on the true meaning of life by the comic series Touch by Mitsuru Adachi.

Educators tend to make things much more complicated for the children, and this guy had just illustrated one of the worse examples. On the next day, I came across a 2,000-page instructional guideline for teaching primary school students to remember the multiplication table. God bless those who wrote it and let's pray those children who were forced to learn simply things under such complicated guidelines.

People's Liberation Army (PLA) Open Day in Macau

The People's Liberation Army (PLA) had been holding opening days on Labor Day and National Day at the Macau base in Taipa since 1999. It was the first time I went to the open day. I was expecting to see some guns and tanks and the usual marching soldiers, but there was a lot more than that. To my amusement, there was a female PLA officer performing Memory from Broadway musical Cats at the talent show, and army chefs serving sophisticated free cuisines to visitors. I felt I was at a theme park instead of a trip to an army camp. I overheard people saying that they had been coming to the open day every year. I think I would probably return next year – just for the sake of free food they are serving.

Marching Drill at People's Liberation Army (PLA) Macau Base Open Day on Labor Day 2008

Perfromance at People's Liberation Army (PLA) Macau Base Open Day

Beijing 2008 Olympics Torch Relay in Macau

Hand on a Mouse

A colleague from another department came over to me and demanded to use my computer to retrieve a file from the intranet and send an urgent email. Since I usually pretend to be nice and friendly to others at the office, I happily agreed her request and took my cup for a cup of coffee at the canteen. When I returned, I saw she was still using my computer and there was a piece of paper tissue between her right hand and my mouse. I tried to pretend I didn't see anything strange or fun. But finally I couldn't resist the temptation to say, "There isn't any virus or disease on my hand, or on my mouse, you know." It seemed she was expecting my question and this was not the first time this issue had been raised, "It's not you. It's my problem. I put the facial tissue on every mouse I use." Don't you just love people who follow their principles?

Introducing My New Penpal: Dr. Richard Hofmann

Normally I do not open emails from people who are not on my contact list. Since I receive over 100 emails on an average day, I just do not have to time or energy to open and read everything. However, a couple weeks ago a gentleman named Dr. Richard Hofmann crashed into my little universe. That was a rare occasion that I decided to check mails in all five of email accounts. Not only had he found a way to write to all five of my email accounts, the tone in his writings was sincere and the story he was telling was logical. So I replied, and he wrote back. So I decided to publish our communications here as a witness to a great friendship in the making.


Dr. Richard Hofmann
From: (timeadmin@bigpond.com)
Sent: Wednesday, May 14, 2008 10:08:41 PM
Reply-to:richardhofmann54@yahoo.com
To: The Dysfunctional Head Diary

Attention Please,

Good day,

My name is Dr. Richard Hofmann, the branch manager of (UBS) UNION BANK OF SWITZERLAND here in Zürich. I have packaged a financial transaction worth the sum of $5,550,000.00 only (five million five hundred and fifty thousand united states dollars only).

This is an abandoned sum that belongs to one of our bank foreign customers who died along with his entire family on Monday, 31 July, 2000 in a plane crash.

Please visit this site, is one of the evidence http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to make this business proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as unclaimed bill.

For our progress, as it was stated in our banking protocols which was signed lawfully that if such fund remains unclaimed till the period of 10 years started from the date when the beneficiary died, the fund will be declared as an unclaimed bill and transferred to the Switzerland ministry of finance. As an honor and advantage bestowed to our foreign customers base on the rules guiding our bank. Rather leaving the fund confiscated of declared as unclaimed bill, I seek your consent and assistance to nominate you as the deceased relation.

(Next beneficiary) under legal process and risk free to repatriate the fund into your private account or a cheque valued the same amount can be issued on your name.

PERCENTAGE RATIO: We will share the fund in a mutual agreed percentage, i.e. 30% being will be your share in respect of your assistance as the account provide for the transfer, 60% will be my share as the pioneer of the business while the rest 10% will be used to install a joint company in your country which will bear our name in particular and whatever profit made out from this company will be used in helping the less privileges, motherless babies home and charity organization in the world. If you are really sure of your trustworthy, accountability and confidentiality on this transaction, contact me and agree that you will not change your mind to cheat or disappoint me when the fund have getting into your account. Besides you should not entertain or hold in mind any fear because I am sure of the success as an insider in the bank. Please on receipt of this mail I would need your contact address, telephone and fax number for effective and easy communication in this transaction and if you agree with me, I would let you know the next step to follow in order to finalize this transaction immediately and at the same time will make arrangement to prepare the Authorization through an Attorney for you to get Possession of the fund.

If you accept this offer, I will appreciate your timely response.

Reply to: richardhofmann54@yahoo.com
Yours truly,
Dr. Richard Hofmann
Zürich Switzerland

Dear Dr. Hofmann,

Thanks for the email. I'm extremely interested in your business proposal. Could you please send me further information?

Best,

Mr. Dysfunctional Head


Dear Mr. Dysfunctional Head,

Good day,

How are you today and hope that all is well with you and your family? I received your mail and the content was cleared understood. I wish to thank you very much for your kind response and also before I proceed I would like to establish and open a good contact with you, because my spirit directed me to contact only you, among others I over Came their contacts. I need someone trustworthy, honest and someone who could not betray me, you know like I got your address in the internet.

I would like a little more details about yourself since we don’t know each other facially. Let me also make it clear to you that this business transaction is genuine and 100% legal and risk free and as soon as we start the processing of the transfer, in seven to nine working days the fund will be in your account while I will come down to meet you for my share.

Please I would like you to send me your contact address both full Bank address, telephone number and fax number, you should please know that What I need is 100% trust and honest so that I don’t fall into a wrong hand.

On receipt of your next mail, promise me that you will keep this transaction to Yourself for security reason. If my note finds an answer in your soul, I am waiting for your mail in order to tell you the next step to follow for you to get possession of this fund.

Please find below attach of the certificate of deposit and my Swiss id to show you whom I am.

Yours truly,
Dr. Richard Hofmann
Tel:++ 41 762 810 722


Dear Dr. Hofmann,

My bank name is Luso International Banking Limited
Phone: 853 28378977
Fax: 853 28578517

Best wishes,

Mr. Dysfunctional Head


Dear Mr. Dysfunctional Head,

Regarding your mail received and all noted with thanks.

How are you and hope that all is well with you today?

Today I will meet an attorney for the change of ownership certificate on your name, I will give you feed back as soon as I finish with the attorney.

We keep in touch...

Have a bless day,

Dr. Richard Hofmann


Dear Dr. Richard Hofmann,

Ok. I look forward to hear from you soon.

Sincerely,

Mr. Dysfunctional Head


Dear Mr. Dysfunctional Head,

Good day,

Please do contact me with this email address because some people I don’t know entered my email, and I decided to use this my private email.

As regard to my last mail, I met an attorney for the change of ownership certificate and this will cost $7,350,00us only. (Seven thousand three hundred and fifty united states dollars only)

We have to prepare a change of ownership certificate and this ownership certificate must be changed on your name for you to get possession of the fund. This means that before this fund could be transferred into your private account, the ownership certificate must be on your name.

I am waiting for your mail to discuss how to pay for your ownership certificate.

Thanks and hope to hear from you soonest.

Regards,

Dr. Richard Hofmann


Dear Dr Hofmann,

I can send the money to you vie bank wire transfer? Could you please send me your bank information a.s.a.p.?

Yours truly,

Mr. Dysfunctional Head


Dear Mr. Dysfunctional Head,

As regards to your mail, received and all noted with thanks.

Please be informed that because of my position in the bank and as well due to security reason, I will advice you send the money via western union direct to the attorney.

I would instruct the attorney who will change your ownership certificate to collect the money for the processing of your certificate.

Please find below the name to pay the money via western union.

Surname: Claude
Given Names: Jean Joseph
Country: Switzerland

Please note that through western union is more faster but due to terrorist problem in the world today in Switzerland, you can collect a maximum of 5,000,00 Swiss francs each (Five thousand Swiss francs only) so split the money into two parts.

E.g.:
1) Send $4,000,00 first part
2) Send $3,350,00 second part.

As soon as you finish the payment via western union, please send details of payment for onward processing of your ownership certificate.

Hope to hear from you soonest.

Yours truly,
Dr. Richard Hofmann


Dear Dr. Hofmann,

Western Union service is not available in the place where I live. I can only send money to Switzerland via SWIFT bank transfer. Could you please provide bank information? Or we will have to seek alternative means to transfer the money.

Since I took this matter very seriously, I just had a rather long conversation with the bank manager. He said he was able to ask one of his former colleagues in Hong Kong to send the money to Switzerland via Western Union. However, he would need a cheque / bank order in the amount of 100 Swiss francs as personal service charges. He will deposit the money into his offshore account in Switzerland so he do not have to pay income taxes on extra incomes like this – as it will move him into a higher tax bracket. So could you please write a cheque of 100 Swiss francs and send it to me via courier or registered air mail?

I really want this deal to go through as soon as possible.

Warmest regards,

Mr. Dysfunctional Head


To my deepest regret, I did not receive any further response from my dear friend Dr. Richard Hoffmann after I wrote this email. Maybe he is not aware just how much I cherished our friendship, and of course the $5,550,000.00 he was going to give me.

Congratulations on the Wedding of DoReMe and Fish

One of the greatest mysteries in life has to be the bizarre English names people in Hong Kong and Macau are using. For some unknown reasons, instead of using the names to make the life easier for foreigners to pronounce, reaffirm one's Christian roots, or simply wanted to sound fashionable, people decided to choose extraordinary words and used them as their English names.

On May 16, 2008, I saw a happy young couple having a wedding banquet at the Macau Tower. While I was admiring their wedding photos, unstoppable laughers busted out of me and I was almost in tears. The name of the bride was apparently DoReMe and the name of the groom was Fish. I'm sure they will make a wonderful couple – as I read in magazines that marriage between people sharing similar tastes and lifestyles usually lasted longer than conflicting couples. Congratulations, DoReMe and Fish!

Movie Review: In the City of Sylvia

Directed by Spanish director José Luis Guerin and starring Pilar López de Ayala and Xavier Lafitte, In the City of Sylvia was the only film I watched at the Macao International Film and Video Festival 2008. Based on my previous viewing experience with the Macao International Film and Video Festival, I was expecting either an extremely boring film by a so-called artistic master or an experimental young director freshly out of the academy without the necessary life experience to make a logical cut with the scenes he/she put together. However, In the City of Sylvia is a little bit of both, and also does not any of these clear drawbacks. (I'm sounding like a professional movie reviewer here.) There is basically no dialogue in the movie, as the camera followed a young man wandering the streets of a French city searching for Sylvia – a girl he met there six years before. He sat silently in cafes and parks looking for Sylvia. When he finally found Sylvia, followed her through the streets of the city in silence, and got to talk to her in the end, he was devastated to find out that he no longer had a clear memory of the girl he met several years ago and this woman was not Sylvia he was looking for. The film ended abruptly. Although the plot was simply, I didn't feel like I was tortured the way some of other films shown at the Festival. The actors looked nice and sexy and the streets of the city in the movie were charming and comfortable. After the movie, the director told the audience that he wanted to show the beauty of people to the audience. That might be too ambitious. But at least he was successful in showing us the streets of a beautiful European city. A nice night out at the cinema, especially when the ticket prices were very low. And the ticket I got was free.

Rising Rice Prices

I went to a supermarket to do some routine grocery shopping last night. I saw piles of rice of different brands on the shelf, but a very strange sign above the rice saying, "Each customer is limited to purchase two bags of rice." I don't see a shortage of rice here, or anywhere else. And I only found the retail price of rise had risen by quite a bit in recent weeks. So I really can't understand the purpose of this sign. Is the only purpose of signs like this is to justify for the raising prices?

The Last Temptation of Free Coffee and Cookies

I was expecting a friend from overseas at the lobby of newly opened Sands Hotel located right next to Sands Casino. While I was waiting for him to come down from his room, I noticed a coffee machine and a plate of cookies sitting nicely at the corner of the hotel lobby. There was no one around the table and I was not sure whether the coffee and cookies were reserved a dedicated function or provided free of charge to all hotel guests. Since I'm not a guest of the hotel, I didn't feel I have the right to receive the complimentary food and beverage provided by the hotel. I was still waiting for him five minutes after making my phone call, and I simply could not keep my eyes and mind away from the coffee and cookies. Although I was more than 20 meters away from the table, I felt I could smell the taste of freshly brewed coffee and butter-filled cookies from other side of the hotel lobby. Suddenly a voice came to me from somewhere inside my head, "It's been sitting there for so long and nobody bothered to touch it, so it must be free. Only idiots would resist free coffee and cookies. Don't waste the golden opportunity." So I rose up slowly from the chair and walked towards the coffee and cookies, smoothly poured a cup of coffee and took out four or five pieces of cookies and talked back to my seat at the other side of the lobby. After finishing my coffee and cookies, I went back to the table and refilled another cup for myself and took out another 10 pieces. I did this with complete ease of mind as though I was doing it at my home. By the time my friend finally came down from his room, I already put back the cup and the plate back to the table. As of today, I still don't know for sure whether the coffee and cookies were provided free of charge to wanderers like me. That experience had left me with such sensation that could not be fulfilled even with the most expensive coffee I ever had.

San Hou Chai Restaurant in Fai Chi Kei: Mama's Cooking at Its Best

I had been told not to expect much service from places such as San Hou Chai Restaurant located at Fai Chi Kei district of Macau. The service did match my expectation – there isn't much service. A couple mid-ageds, untrained temporary staff was serving rushing back and forth between 20 tables in an over-crowded and noisy balcony. I was also told that the food was decent. And that's when San Hou Chai Restaurant exceeded my expectations by a very large margin. It's not only good. It's really good! It captured the essence of family-style neighborhood cooking at its best. Take the frying eggplant as an example, the sizzling secret receipt sauce steaming on an iron plate really turned an ordinary family dish into a gourmet masterpiece. The chef successfully turned ordinary materials such as chicken and pork chop into discerning dishes that truly reminded me of some of the best food I every enjoyed. As I walked out of the front door of San Hou Chai Restaurant, the final scene from the Pixar movie Ratatouille came back to me. In the movie, Rémy decided to prepare ratatouille, a traditional dish not considered haute cuisine, but did it so well that the first taste of it caused Ego to relive a childhood memory of his mother making it for him. I had exactly the same sensation when I was having my meal there. To complete a perfect night of fine dining, the seven-course meal costs only a little bit over 200 patacas. That's a great experience for both the mouth and the wallet.

Water Magical Show: Beauty of Harmony in Macau 2008

Macau Celebrations for the Beijing Olympics, 100 Days Towards Beijing Olympic Games "Beauty of Harmony in Macau 2008 - Water Magical Show" is an awfully long name for a show. Activities with awfully long names usually ended up as awful performances. And this one is no exception.

According to Studio Festi, the producer of the show, "the first part of the show represents through symbols the deep meaning of Harmony. Everything is in a bigger scale than reality: like the combination of simultaneous musical notes the symbols end up in accord. Floating giant ladies and spheres, ballerinas, a sailing ship in a magical choreography represent the harmony. The lake is full of life: fishes and a majestic swan parade representing the beauty of nature." All I saw was a series of very ugly fake swans attached to sampans driving pass me. There is nothing artistic about it. Not only I didn't feel any harmony, I somehow got a very strong feeling that millions of taxpayers' money was wasted by bureaucratic at Macau Sport Development Board, Civil and Municipal Affairs Bureau and Macau Government Tourist Office.

"The second part of the show is dedicated to Sport. Sport is passion, it is the struggle to overtake man's limits, it is the fair fight to excel in every way. The laws ruling the perfect balance of the world are the same laws which rule the competition. A choreography of flying athletes crosses the sky while the flags representing the harmony amongst the people taking part in sport competitions are displayed on the lake." Again, I don't see any symbol of athletics from different countries and ethic backgrounds participating in various sports - as often symbolized in Olympics propaganda. I only saw a bunch of Caucasion guys playing European elitist sports. If that the director idea of "perfect balance of the world", then it's a pretty screwed up one.

"The third part of the show is dedicated to the representation of beauty. Water, fire, the perfection of the movements of the dancers are the expressions of the ideal beauty which man looks for in his life. It is not beauty for the sake of beauty: it is beauty for the sake of harmony. On the scene are projections on water screens, dancers with torches and fire, flying spheres representing the sun, music and ... a little magic." Again, the show totally wasted the scenic backdrop that consist of the Praia Grande lake, bridges and high raising casinos. The fire was tiny comparing with the environment and failed to stir up any magic whatsoever. The whole finale was just like a armature performers who makes a living by juggling fire on the streets.

At the end of the show, no one applauded. Everybody just walked away in silence. Instead of celebrating for the countdown towards Beijing Olympics or create harmony and magic, the show is just a total waste of money.